Aziraphale and Crowley crash a gender reveal party
by TFALokiwriter
Summary: What is says on the tin


"Aziraphale!" Crowley crashed alongside his reading companion on the couch and wrapped his hand around the shorter man's shoulder. Aziraphale lowered his reading glasses then turned his attention toward the thin fallen angel. "You know those couple who just recently moved in near down our South Downs Cottage?"

"Yes," Aziraphale nodded as he turned his attention upon him. "what about them?"

"They are throwing a gender reveal party." Crowley said.

Aziraphale paled taking off the reading glasses.

"You mean that fad where they decide someones gender before they are born and relentlessly argue that's their gender to their death after the children are of age to decide who they are to the point the children get themselves killed?"

"Yes."

"And the fad is still growing?"

"Yes."

"Crowley, how can I help?"

"I need balloons."

"That is very convenient." He put the novel on the table alongside him as his counterpart was slouched in the couch with his arms on the rims of the couch. "I have all the balloons from Adam's last birthday party left over."

Crowley grinned.

"Any more help?" Aziraphale asked.

"No. Not really," Crowley said. "I got a buddy who accidentally found a hobby in raising cockroaches so I got that part handled down pat."

". . . Darling, can I do a little few things?" Aziraphale said.

"Sure," Crowley said. "It'll be ruined by the cockroaches."

"Noooo, it is not going to be pretty." Aziraphale's face brightened with a smile. "It is going to very unpleasant."

"Aziraphale. . ."

"Yes?" Aziraphale said.

"Are you being. . ." Crowley raised a brow and lifted down his dark sunglasses. "a little devilish angel?"

Sheepishly, Aziraphale shrugged with a giggle.

"A little." He lowered his index finger and thumb together. "God can let it that slide. Doing the Lord's work." he relaxed his hands. "She would have done the exact same thing. These people need to regret deciding that event."

"At all." Crowley said.

"Yes." Aziraphale nodded.

"I am sure that what you have in mind and what I have in mind; these morons will regret _thinking_ of it."

Crowley pecked a kiss on to Aziraphale's forehead.

"Be right back. Getting the cockroaches."

And Crowley was gone in the blink of a eye then so was Aziraphale.

* * *

"Honey, I told you those two don't need to be part of our gender reveal party."

The couple had their door closed while in the hallway. It was a dark hallway that had the lights off but the only light that was pouring in was coming from the foggy glass panels alongside each side of the doorway so the figures were able to be seen as mere shadows in the scenery that were moving.

"Yes." Sarah said, firmly. "They do."

"Whhhhhhhy?" Jacob whined. "They ruined our engagement party."

"By complete accident!" Sarah said.

"Hooooneeey!" Jacob said.

"No one anticipated the Spanish inquisition and we sure didn't expect Crowley and his then-boyfriend to ride their old car into the living room!"

"They did! It was intentional!" Jacob insisted. "I swear! It was!"

"Jacob, they helped us renovate the place and give us those hard to get novels that covered your student loans."

Sarah took Jacob's hands and squeezed them with a smile as she reminded the shorter man of the obstacle they crossed.

"Yes," Jacob said. "They did. To pay for the damage."

"And it was the most generous anyone had been to us in a long, long , long time." Sarah said. "Incredibly rare to come by books and we are still using the left over money to this day from the sell."

"In a storage container." Jacob said with a small laugh. "Got so much that we have to keep it in safe keeping."

"We are covered to raise these twins for the rest of their natural lives." She clasped the side of his cheek with a smile. "We owe them."

"And then we're done owing them?" Jacob asked, hopefully.

"No." Sarah shook her head. "That doesn't count."

"Alright." Jacob sighed. "But when the day comes, I am taking the opportunity and we're done being in their debt."

Sarah smiled.

"I agree." Sarah said with a small nod.

Sarah slid open the door then spotted the couple holding on to several balloons, several cake dishes, and cooler behind them.

"You come in just the nick of time!" Jacob said. "Our gender reveal party is very. . . ill put."

"Good thing you called the cavalry, Sarah!"

Crowley sprinted in past Jacob who sent a nasty glare toward Sarah. Crowley turned from the hallway leading into the living room and gestured toward the tall white cake with layers. The smell emitting from the cake was enough to bring delight to the couple even smiles that were not there before.

"Yes, it is!" Sarah smiled.

"Left side of it is boy and the right side is girl." Crowley said.

"I bought it from a local cake making shop." Aziraphale said, helpfully, carrying the balloons.

"Where is the party?" Crowley asked.

"Out back." Sarah said.

"Wonderful!" Crowley said then went through the doorway.

"When are the other members of the family going to be here?" Aziraphale asked.

"In a hour." Then, Sarah hugged Aziraphale. "You're a life saver."

Aziraphale smiled then patted on her back quite lightly.

"You don't know just how much of a lifesaver that I am!" Aziraphale said, happily. "I will get the treats and the drinks in."

"Thank you." Sarah said as he went past Jacob.

Aziraphale was giddy, but almost regretting his decision.

_Almost._

* * *

The party was set up for the couple with the untainted refreshments and food left on a different set of tables across from the food that the Crowleys had brought over. The guests settled in about the backyard and Crowley turned into a snake then went into a bush and watched as the scene began to unfold. Sarah was blinded folded and given a machete by Aziraphale much to the shock of the party goers.

"Honey-"

"It'll be fun!"

"It is fun!"

"Honey-that is a machete!"

"It's a bat!"

"It's a toy,"

Aziraphale backed out of the crowd as the father of the bride twirled Sarah then stepped back. Aziraphale took a concoction that was mostly alcohol free then sipped from the cup and watched as the scene began to play out. The fallen demon grinned watching the disaster begin to unfold in a matter of minutes with a delighted hiss.

The children pried off pieces of cake then looked in awe and shrieked in disgust over the cheering of the family as Sarah waved the machete in the air and waved it in the air in a hazard way then nearly struck the grandmother that Aziraphale managed to yank out of the way in the nick of time. A small but tiny miracle sparing her life. The woman struck open the balloons sending them flying open.

It was the most glorious but horrifying reveal.

And the entire party goes were covered in head to toe in cockroaches.

"COCKROACHES!" Jacob shrieked.

"That's my darling husband." Aziraphale whispered over the screaming of the guests.

"WORMS!"

"What is this? Lemonade?"

Sarah lifted the blindfolded and shrieked then ran back inside of the house. Aziraphale came over toward the bush then sipped from more of his drink then looked on in pride and a grinning that made him appear excited. It was as if he were watching a disaster that were in massive proportions; lesser than flames, torches, and weapons. It was done in a way of chaos and screaming that warmed his heart.

"Time to go, Angel." Crowley said.

"No, dear Crowley," Aziraphale said. "Just a little bit longer."

"What else did you do?" Crowley studied Aziraphale.

"I have a mean streak that has to be seen." Aziraphale replied.

"You? Docile little angel being mean as a demon?" Crowley raised his head up. "I-I don't know what to say."

"Say nothing at all, darling." Aziraphale grinned then turned toward the ruined party.

"ANTS! BEES! WASPS!"

Crowley turned his head toward Aziraphale with widened eyes.

"Aziraphale-"

"I coated everything in pollen save for the drinks. Leave out sweet food long enough and bugs arrive."

"I love you." Crowley said.

Aziraphale planted a kiss on the side of Crowley's snake head.

"I love you, too." Aziraphale said.

Aziraphale looked on with a pleased grin.

"Five more minutes." Crowley said.

"Good enough." Aziraphale said, then looked on worried toward the fleeing guests running back and forth from the buzzing. "I hope no one gets hurt."

"If they do, how about we miracle it away?" Crowley asked.

"Yes." Aziraphale said.

They stood there watching the chaos unfolded. The tarp that was held between the two trees fall as the father of the bride chased after the buzzing creatures with a can screaming in rage and Jacob cowered underneath the table rocking himself back and forth freaked out. As the backyard emptied, Aziraphale and Crowley left from the scene as a bird and a snake fleeing away before the eventual to be grandfather started to chase after them. And he could have swore that he heard laughter from the creatures.

**The End.**


End file.
